


19. Zero Gravity

by Quefish



Series: Ineffable Kinktober 2020 [13]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Alpha Centauri (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Blow Jobs, Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Drinking, Fluff and Humor, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy References, Humor, Ineffable Kinktober 2020, M/M, Memory Loss, Oral Sex, Other, PanGalactic Gargle Blasters, Zero-gravity blowjob, Zero-gravity sex, implied handjobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:46:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27102166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quefish/pseuds/Quefish
Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley finally make the trip to Alpha Centauri, which isn't nearly the destination they were expecting. They enjoy local activities in the meantime.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Ineffable Kinktober 2020 [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1959229
Comments: 8
Kudos: 45
Collections: Ineffable Kinktober 2020





	19. Zero Gravity

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit of a crossover, but only taking elements from Douglas Adams, no characters or plot points, so I’m not sure if it counts. 
> 
> CW: There is memory loss in the form of drinking too much, but they are not in any danger, no one is hurt and there is no non-con. It is a standard, "Holy cow, what do you remember?" with no external consequences.

“Crowley?” Aziraphale’s voice was high and worried.

“Mmhmm?” Crowley’s sounded not much better.

“I was certain that, when you’d first posed the idea of coming here, that you’d said no one would even notice us.” Aziraphale was still speaking in hushed, if high pitched tones.

“Errgh, I guess things changed.” Crowley matched Aziraphale’s volume.

“Clearly. So what do we do now?!” Aziraphale’s tone went from dry to frantic in a single breath.

“Pub?” Crowley took Aziraphale’s hand and started walking to a building that had pictures of drinks on it, hoping that they’d have something drinkable.

Aziraphale was pulled along, through crowds of … beings … Some vaguely human shaped, some actually appeared to be human, but obviously couldn’t be. When they’d popped themselves onto a planet in Alpha Centauri, they’d both frozen where they landed, shocked to find a bustling nightlife in sway around them. Bright clothing, some very fancy looking if Aziraphale was to go by how the wearer acted, and while the languages around him were beyond his comprehension, the overall tone of the area was one of vivacious fun. The angel had to admit, the environment was affecting, because the sounds may not have been understandable, but a smile was universal, apparently literally! A small giggle escaped him as he waved at a group rocking with laughter at something in one of their hands. They may have waved back, but he couldn’t really tell as he was being pulled into the building Crowley had spied. 

Taking a quick look around, a table in the corner miraculously became open and Crowley grinned as they slid into the chairs, facing the room. Crowley looked around to get an idea of drinks, and currency as a being came over, presumably to take their order if the datapad in their hands was any indication. Crowley took a quick look at the menu and his eyes were immediately drawn to what looked like the most expensive drink on offer. He pointed at it, and indicated they both wanted one. The server’s eyes went wide and pointed to a couple of other choices instead, but Crowley insisted. The server slumped a bit and held out a hand in the time honored and recognized request for payment, which Crowley handed over, and headed to the bar. Crowley watched with interest as a somewhat heated looking discussion with the being behind the bar occurred, waving cheerfully when they both turned to his table with a Look. 

“Crowley look!” Aziraphale grabbed his sleeve and Crowley’s eyes followed Aziraphale’s finger. “I hadn’t truly realized what I was looking at before, but nearly every, well, _person_ for lack of a better word, has a book! And they are all the same, I wonder how to get our hands on one?”

“Let’s ask our charming waitstaff, shall we?” Crowley looked up with a smile as the drinks were set in front of them and he took his card back. He engaged in some rudimentary gesturing to inquire about the books and they shrugged as though it wasn’t a very interesting question, pulling their own out of … somewhere, and then handing it to them. Aziraphale snatched it up immediately, as politely as he could under the circumstances, and the server gave a chuckle and indicated he could keep it, pulling out another and showing that they had another copy anyway. The server tucked the book away as they walked away, still chuckling.

“Well, it looks helpful at any rate, the print on the outside is in English.” Aziraphale turned the book around and Crowley got an eyeful of the _’DON’T PANIC’_ emblazoned on the back. “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the … How fascinating!”

Their drinks sat forgotten as they tried to navigate the book, which acted like Crowley’s mobile, truth be told, but with far more information, and he had to admit, easier as well. Aziraphale was transfixed at the wealth of information wondering out loud if Heaven knew about any of this. Crowley looked around them again and saw their server and the barkeep staring in their direction. He remembered their drinks. 

“Angel, we are getting weird looks, we’d better at least try whatever these are.” 

“Oh! Yes, of course, terribly rude of me.” Aziraphale carefully closed the book and looked up at the server questioningly as he slowly put it in his pocket. The server nodded and waved him away, and Aziraphale beamed and waved in thanks. 

They looked at the drinks, which didn’t look particularly … well, particularly anything, truth be told. The glass was interesting, but other than that, it was clear and looked to have an ice cube in it. It was also small, barely a mouthful, it appeared to be a shot more than a drink. They picked up their drinks and toasted.

“To new adventures, my dear?”

“Absolutely … “

They smiled soppily at each other as they upended their glasses and swallowed. The ice cube seemed to melt immediately and slid down as well, causing an ultra cold sensation to follow the liquor. They had exactly two seconds to look at each other curiously before they each grabbed their heads and involuntarily screamed for about seven seconds before slumping back into their seats in a cold sweat. Looking around, they’d gotten a few curious looks, but most of the bar seemed to take no notice at all of their outburst.

“Oh, good Lord, that felt like … “

“Feels like I got my head bashed in by something hard and shiny … like a gold brick … “

“Wrapped in a twist of lemon … “

They nodded at each other before shaking their heads to clear them, looking down at the innocent looking empty glasses. Their heads had stopped hurting fairly quickly and now they were just feeling like they usually did after drinking for a bit. Crowley picked his glass up and gave it a sniff.

“Doesn’t really smell like anything, but had a taste like, Satan, I don’t even know.” he looked over at Aziraphale who seemed to be clearing up a bit and grinned. “Want another?”

Aziraphale smiled back. “Don’t mind if I do.”

~~~~~

Crowley slowly regained consciousness, dreamily thinking over their evening. He had no idea how many drinks they had, was it really only three? After the second and third drinks, which Crowley decided to call Screamy Water and Aziraphale had no better suggestion, they had switched to something else if for no other reason than to not damage their throats, but the next little bit was a haze. He looked around and determined they were in a room, a hotel by the looks of it, the decor was just as nightmarish as any on Earth even if he got the impression that this was a premier suite. He looked down and found his trousers and pants around his thighs, and Aziraphale’s hand wrapped around his cock, but Aziraphale was definitely asleep. There was come everywhere … had Aziraphale fallen asleep mid-handjob? Had Crowley?!

Aziraphale was in a similar state of disarray and bodily fluids. What on Earth … or whatever this planet’s inhabitants called it, had happened last night?!

Crowley sat up as well as he was able when he suddenly realized he wasn’t lying on a bed but literally floating. He carefully, and regretfully, removed Aziraphale’s hand and shook him awake. 

“Angel? Angel … “ There was a mumble but nothing more came out of the angel. “Aziraphale!” 

Blue eyes flew open and Aziraphale attempted to sit up, but with nothing to push against for friction, he was only gently flailing. Crowley pulled him closer and they looked at each other with mild, confused alarm.

“Dear, where are we? And … and why are we so indecent?! And … sticky?!” Aziraphale waved them clean and fixed the state of their trousers with a blush. 

“You realize I’ve seen you naked before.” Aziraphale muttered something about it not being the same as Crowley chuckled. “Ok, so what do _you_ remember? I remember two Screamy Waters, maybe three? Then at least one more drink, and then I woke up with your hand around my dick covered in who knows how many orgasms. So, guessing that you fell asleep right after jerking me off, or I did and you used me like a security blanket.”

“Or both. Yes, I remember the drinks, and maybe walking down the road? Eating some sugared something or other, and then waking up here.” Aziraphale looked around the room. “Considering the state of our memories, I am stunned to not be suffering some terrible hangover.” 

Crowley nodded absently as he came to a conclusion. “I don’t like not remembering what we did. We came to a fancy space hotel that apparently has no gravity, had very messy sex, and I don’t remember it.”

“Well, there is a simple way to fix that, dear.” There was a snap and Crowley yelped at the speed of his becoming naked. “I’m loathe to not take advantage of this situation as well.”

Aziraphale gave Crowley’s arm a gentle yank until his pelvis was hovering over his face and gave him a slow turn, bringing Crowley eye level to where he was lazily stroking himself. 

“Well, then … this should be interesting.” Crowley flicked out his tongue over the head of Aziraphale’s cock. Aziraphale’s hand disappeared and Crowley felt his arms wrap around the small of his back as the angel reciprocated the licking. 

Crowley swallowed down Aziraphale’s cock with enough force that it set them in a gentle spin, not having a bed to stop their movements. When he felt his own cock nudge the back of Aziraphale’s mouth he groaned hand enough to encourage a heavy thrust from Aziraphale’s hips. Their trajectory changed and now they were in an odd spiraling twist. He mentally shrugged and decided to take advantage of the lack of physical limitations in the room and tucked Aziraphale’s thighs up under his arms and felt ankles link behind his head. Aziraphale did the same and they were suddenly in a position that went from feeling like a ‘sixty-nine’ and more like Lego bricks stuck together. He hummed a chuckle at the visual he imagined, and then opened his eyes to realize he didn’t have to imagine it. Their suite had a number of strategic mirrors that he had neglected to notice before. 

_”Satan, he’s beautiful, and he loves me … “_ Crowley was broken from his romantic thoughts as he felt a slick digit tickling around and then entering him, gentle but wasting no time in finding the bundle of nerves and rubbing firmly. He bucked as far as he was able, locked in place by Aziraphale’s arms and legs, desperately trying to get somehow deeper as he came with a mumbled cry around Aziraphale’s cock. 

Aziraphale released him and then ended up gently drifting, dangling below Crowley as the demon continued sucking his cock. He came with a soft gasp and sigh, his voice calm and loving as Crowley drifted back up to his side to cuddle on top of him as they floated above the bed. 

“That was amazing, darling.” Aziraphale lightly scratched his nails over Crowley’s arms and back, giving him sleepy shivers. “You know, coming here … what we found was definitely a surprise, but it does make me wonder … What else is out here?”

“Well, we should definitely find out, I think. Maybe limit the Screamy Waters to one a night though.” 

Aziraphale eagerly agreed, nodding his head. “Indeed. That should be more of a special occasion sort of drink.” 

“Nap and then head out to the stars?”

“Yes. And perhaps, before we go, take advantage of the entertaining and unusual lack of gravity again?”

Crowley kissed Aziraphale’s throat with a chuckle. “Oh, now that I know this is an option, I’ll do it at home sometimes too.”


End file.
